Our crap-hole apartment

I really want to use a word other than crap, but I'll be good. It's raining, which means our window is leaking...again. The same window that supposedly FINALLY got fixed last time it rained cats and dogs. I can't even begin to enumerate all the things that are wrong with this apartment and how much I would love to move out of it, but it's just not an option right now. Brian is only planning on having this job for another year, so we'd be moving then anyway, who knows where to. I REALLY want to go back to Texas. I know it's probably because of the hormones, but I've been crying every other night because I miss it so much. I think of all the things we'd have that we don't have here and it just frustrates me. Right now, we are a family of five trying to survive on $40k/year in a super expensive part of the country. We're doing fine, but we have to go without things like tv, etc., because we just can't afford it right now. We can't even really go on dates because 1.) babysitting is expensive and 2.) we can't afford to do anything fun anyway...Wendy's gets a little old after a while. If we lived in Texas, assuming Brian gets a job that pays comparably or better, we could afford to go on dates (things are MUCH cheaper there...nighttime movie rates are cheaper there than matinee prices are here, for one). We'd also have both sets of parents nearby, which would be great not only for us, but for them, too...I know the grandparents miss our kids terribly and it breaks my heart that we've had to force them apart. Who knows, maybe we could even get a house. If not, we could definitely afford a better apartment than THIS one.
All that being said, I know that God moved us here for a reason. He has taught us so many wonderful lessons, like how to trust Him when things get tight financially, and how to be more frugal. Brian and I have gotten a LOT closer because we're all we have. Yes, Brian and my children are my home and I wouldn't want to live anywhere without them, but my heart still aches to be in Texas. So, right now, I'm praying that God will open up an AWESOME job opportunity for Brian in the DFW area, preferably in the Mid-cities, and that we can go home...if that is not God's will, I'm praying that he changes my heart so it doesn't get crushed.